Title: If I Die Before I Wake
Expected
publication: 11 January 2018
My
Rating: ๐๐๐
Book Description (Goodreads):
Everyone believes Alex is in a coma, unlikely to ever wake
up. As his family debate withdrawing life support, and his friends talk about
how his girlfriend Bea needs to move on, he can only listen.
But Alex soon begins to suspect that the accident that put him here wasn’t really an accident. Even worse, the perpetrator is still out there and Alex is not the only one in danger.
As he goes over a series of clues from his past, Alex must use his remaining senses to solve the mystery of who tried to kill him, and try to protect those he loves, before they decide to let him go.
But Alex soon begins to suspect that the accident that put him here wasn’t really an accident. Even worse, the perpetrator is still out there and Alex is not the only one in danger.
As he goes over a series of clues from his past, Alex must use his remaining senses to solve the mystery of who tried to kill him, and try to protect those he loves, before they decide to let him go.
My musings:
I know that this book is not going to be published until
January. Plus, I have plenty of books on my reading list that I should be
reading first. But I felt like I just needed something a bit different,
something that stood out from the fray– what would fit the bill better than a mystery
told from the POV of a character in a permanent vegetative state, his active mind
trapped in a lifeless body and unable to communicate? I just couldn’t resist!
Alex is in a coma, unable to move his body, eat, speak, or even
move his eyes. Two years after a
terrible climbing accident, the doctors have long given up on him ever
regaining any function and have been unable to prove that Alex is even aware of
his surroundings. Pneumonia has almost claimed his life several times, but
still Alex clings on to the small hope that one day he can return to his old
life, his girlfriend, his family. Lying helpless in bed, totally at the mercy
of others, he overhears his visitors talking about the incident that has cost
him his life as he knew it, but as hard as he tries to think back, he cannot
remember anything. Hearing that the police are investigating his accident as a possible
attempted murder, Alex is determined to find out what happened – if it’s the
last thing he will ever do.
I really loved the premise of If I Die Before I Wake, which
was both original and captivating. Imagining what it must feel like for our
main character, Alex, trapped in his own body unable to communicate even his
most basic needs or pain, created an almost unbearable tension. His frustration
over his helplessness was highlighted by the many scenes in which he had to
endure pain or suffering, simply because of being locked into his lifeless
body. It was horrible to imagine what this must be like! The mystery element is
well thought out and kept my attention, and it was interesting how slowly but
surely all the pieces of the puzzle came together in Alex’s mind. The
interpersonal relationships were sensitively drawn – the nurses, the doctors,
Alex’s girlfriend and family – and made for some touching and some infuriating
moments.
The main issue I had with the book was the pacing. Whilst
Alex’s predicament made for an original plotline, it also slowed down the story
quite significantly in places, whilst the reader follows his long internal
dialogue and his daily frustrations. It reminded me a bit of Tom Hanks’ epic
movie Castaway, where a marooned Chuck Noland only has his volleyball to talk
to – which, to be fair, is very original, but wore a bit thin after a while.
Parts of the story dragged a bit for me, and I would have liked to have a
different element introduced, a different POV perhaps, just to move the story
along and shed light on some other aspects of the investigation Alex was not privy
to. Some threads didn’t seem to go anywhere, like the scene where Alex’s
catheter “fell out”, which made me wonder if I had missed something? Because of
this, I struggled at times to fully connect to Alex, hoping for things to move
along a bit faster than they did.
Summary:
All in all, If I Die Before I Wake was a very original
mystery written from the POV from the most unlikely character – a man trapped inside his lifeless body, surely one of the most terrible situations a person could
find themselves in. Koch explores this topic with sensitivity and insight,
realistically portraying the frustrations of her helpless character as he strives
to find out the truth. Whilst the pacing was a bit slow for me at times, the
story certainly made up for it in originality. One of the most unusual mysteries
I have read this year.
Thank
you to Netgalley and Random House UK for the free electronic copy of this novel and
for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.
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