Book Review: BEFORE YOU KNEW MY NAME by Jaqueline Bublitz

 

Title: BEFORE YOU KNEW MY NAME

Author:  Jaqueline Bublitz

Publisher:  Atria / Emily Bestler Books

Read: August 2022

Expected publication: out now

My Rating: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 all the stars!

 

 

Book Description:

 

This is not just another novel about a dead girl.

When she arrived in New York on her 18th birthday carrying nothing but $600 cash and a stolen camera, Alice Lee was looking for a fresh start. Now, just one month later, she is the city's latest Jane Doe, an unidentified murder victim.

Ruby Jones is also trying to start over; she travelled halfway around the world only to find herself lonelier than ever. Until she finds Alice's body by the Hudson River.

From this first, devastating encounter, the two women form an unbreakable bond. Alice is sure that Ruby is the key to solving the mystery of her life - and death. And Ruby - struggling to forget what she saw that morning - finds herself unable to let Alice go. Not until she is given the ending she deserves.

Before You Knew My Name doesn't ask whodunnit. Instead, this powerful, hopeful novel asks: Who was she? And what did she leave behind? The answers might surprise you.

 

My musings:

 

It’s wonderful how the books that will most affect you emotionally somehow find their way to you. When I was first invited to read BEFORE YOU KNEW MY NAME, the book hadn’t even been on my radar but its premise intrigued me. “this is not just another novel about a dead girl” is an apt description of Jacqueline Bublitz’s  debut novel, because it is unlike any other story I have ever read.

We know from the beginning that Alice Lee, the narrator of the story, is dead, telling us about her fate from beyond the grave. The catch was that I hadn’t counted on how Alice would reel me in, show me the world through her eyes and utterly break my heart in the process! Then there is Ruby Jones, who arrives in New York City on the same day Alice does, with just as much baggage and just as many hopes and dreams for a better future. The one thing that will link the two women together is Alice’s death, because it is Ruby who will find her body, and who will not be able to put the unidentified dead girl out of her mind.

BEFORE YOU KNEW MY NAME captures the essence of being alive, trying to make a mark on the world. Alice Lee, the riverside Jane Doe, the unidentified victim of a brutal murder, is not ready to be forgotten, lost among all the other nameless girls out there who have never gotten justice. Her life has been cruelly robbed just as she was forging a new bright future for herself. But how do the dead get justice, how can they make themselves heard? Ruby, the jogger who finds Alice’s body, could have simply moved on with her life, filed the experience away, tried to forget all about it. Instead, she becomes obsessed with finding out more about the dead girl she found on the riverbank that horrible rainy day. A life has been taken, and Ruby cannot let it go. Just like that, a connection is formed between two strangers, one dead and one alive.

If I had any doubts about a narrator telling her story from beyond the grave being able to touch me emotionally, I was soon swept away by Bublitz’s beautiful prosaic writing and the emotional insights she offers on every page. Both Alice and Ruby are flawed in ways most readers will be able to relate, from a time they too tried to find their place in the world. Alice’s mix of street smarts and innocence immediately got under my skin and I found myself caring deeply for her, which opened doors to emotions deeply buried and not often explored. It’s always the sign of a great book if it has the power to make you cry, and this book certainly hit hard.  My heart shattered into a million pieces the moment Alice’s life was stolen from her, and I couldn’t stop reading until the story reached its finale.

 

Summary:

 

BEFORE YOU KNEW MY NAME is a poignant, beautifully written and emotionally charged book about connection, grief and new beginnings that shot an arrow deeply into my heart and lodged there. It is one of the best books I have read this year. Don’t miss it!

 

 

Thank you to Netgalley and Atria / Emily Bestler Books for the free electronic copy of this novel and for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.

 

Book Review: THE PERFECT WIFE by J.P. Delaney

Title: THE PERFECT WIFE

Author: J.P. Delaney
Publisher: Quercus Books
Read: July 2019

Expected publication: 8 August 2019

My Rating: 🌟🌟🌟🌟1/2

Book Description:

Abbie awakens in a daze with no memory of who she is or how she landed in this unsettling condition. The man by her side claims to be her husband. He's a titan of the tech world, the founder of one of Silicon Valley's most innovative start-ups. He tells Abbie that she is a gifted artist, an avid surfer, a loving mother to their young son, and the perfect wife. He says she had a terrible accident five years ago and that, through a huge technological breakthrough, she has been brought back from the abyss.

She is a miracle of science.

But as Abbie pieces together memories of her marriage, she begins questioning her husband's motives--and his version of events. Can she trust him when he says he wants them to be together forever? And what really happened to Abbie half a decade ago?

Beware the man who calls you . . .

My musings:

Careful – enter at own risk. Because under this innocuous title hides a story that is just INSANE! My mind is still reeling from the roller coaster ride, and I’m not sure that my simple hippie mind really understood it all in the end.

Take my advice and go into this one blindly. The title really doesn’t do the book justice, so don’t expect a run-of-the-mill thriller here. It will blow your mind. It will challenge the way you perceive reality, and you will never look at that stranger on the bus quite the same way again. I won’t give anything away here, except that this is one of the most original thrillers I have EVER read. If I could sum it up in just one word, the term “disturbing” comes to mind. This book was a minefield of moral and ethical dilemmas for me as the doomed characters played out their part in the plot. I am so glad I read this as a buddy read, because all I could do after turning the last page was getting online, mouth agape, and write WTH have I just read??????? If not for the inconvenience of work, and family, and actions of daily living, I would have devoured this in one sitting, because it utterly consumed me. I am still waiting for someone to explain the ending to me!

What I can safely say without spoilers is that Delaney incorporates a theme close to his heart here, which is autism. In a heartfelt postscript he writes about his own son and the heartbreaking journey his family went on to help make his life with autism easier. These emotions shine through in one of the characters in the book and added additional depth and heart to the story.

If you liked the creepiness of the techno-house in Delaney’s book THE GIRL BEFORE, then I think you will enjoy this one. Allow your mind to be blown. Read it with a buddy or a group so you can text them at 2 a.m. with questions. Readers who have been disillusioned with predictable thrillers will find that there is nothing predictable or run-of-the-mill here.  Readers who think that their smartphone is scary technology may want to have a stiff drink before embarking on this one. Thank you. J.P. Delaney for blowing my mind. You have restored my faith in the genre for being able to surprise and astound. Mind blown .....

 Thank you to Netgalley and Quercus Books for the free electronic copy of this novel and for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.

Book Review: THE PERFECT GIRLFRIEND by Karen Hamilton

Title:  The Perfect Girlfriend

Author: Karen Hamilton
Publisher: Hachette Australia
Read: February 2018

Expected publication: 27 February 2018

My Rating: 🌟🌟🌟🌟

I want a happy-ever-after, and you're going to give it to me.

Book Description:

Juliette loves Nate. She will follow him anywhere. She's even become a flight attendant for his airline, so she can keep a closer eye on him.

They are meant to be.

The fact that Nate broke up with her six months ago means nothing. Because Juliette has a plan to win him back. She is the perfect girlfriend. And she'll make sure no one stops her from getting exactly what she wants.

True love hurts, but Juliette knows it's worth all the pain... 

My musings:

Ok, here I am, fingers poised on the keyboard, and finding myself speechless. The Perfect Girlfriend was one of the strangest books I have read in a long time. And I mean that in a good way. In fact, this was such a fun read for me! Narrated in the first person by our main protagonist Juliette (aka Lily, aka Elisabeth), the story drew me in immediately as it became clear that there were some very unusual dynamics at play here. Juliette’s boyfriend Nate may have ended their relationship, but she is not that easily dumped. According to her, the two of them are “meant to be”, if only she could make Nate see sense. 

"And the overriding problem I have is that Nate thinks he doesn't love me. Once he realises that he does, everything should naturally realign."

And Juliette will not stop at anything to get her point across. From breaking into Nate’s apartment to leave his favourite muffins in the freezer for him, to changing careers in order of getting a job with the airline he works for, to even installing a spy app on his phone to keep track of his every move, this is a girl who knows what she wants and who is determined to get it!

"Perseverance always pays off. It never, ever fails."

Extremely well written and compelling in its storyline and no-nonsense narrator, The Perfect Girlfriend took me on a rollercoaster ride of conflicting emotions. I sometimes felt like I was in a game of twister, one leg on disbelief, the other on humour, with one hand on horror and the other waving frantically around in an effort to come up for air. For most of the book the palette of emotions congealed in a kind of morbid fascination as I breathlessly watched events unfold, knowing that nothing good could come of Juliette / Lily’s actions.

Juliette is a most unusual character. Whilst not quite as blunt as Gail Honeyman’s Eleanor, Juliette is quite frank about her bordering-on-sociopathic thoughts and emotions. It is obvious that she has a problem, and that her actions veer into crazy territory, and yet anyone who has ever been cheated on, slighted or bullied will gain a certain satisfaction from her well thought out plans of revenge and her total lack of boundaries. 

"You think that you can use people and discard them when it suits. Like I was nothing. Like I meant nothing. Like we meant nothing. And you're still doing it today."

At times her rationale was quite humorous and cynical, and made me laugh. Does that make me crazy, too? I really wanted to see Nate and Bella get what they deserved – most of us have had a character like that in our lives at some stage, the privileged person to whom rules don’t seem to apply, who bully and wheedle and get their own way, sailing through life on the expense of others. 

"Girls like her get to make decisions about girls like me. Who our friends are or aren't, who will or won't speak to us, and even how teachers view us. And I was getting more and more sick of it."

I hated them both, knowing that Juliette was probably not the most reliable judge of character. And despite everything, I never stopped rooting for Juliette, which to me highlights Karen Hamilton’s skills as a writer to elicit such empathy in the reader that they are willing to justify or simply overlook and forgive Juliette’s crazy actions.

As far as psychological thrillers go, it is difficult these days to find one with an original premise that has not been done a million times before in various shades of grey. Hamilton somehow managed that difficult trick, and it really paid off for me. From the airline setting, which was unusual and interesting, to a character who defies all stereotypes of your typical young air hostess, I couldn’t tear myself away from the story. I won’t give any more away in terms of plot, because I don’t want to spoil anything for other readers, just to say that the story managed to shock and surprise right up to the end. Points for the most unusual and original psychological thriller of the year so far! Did it thrill – yes. Surprise? Yes! Shock? Definitely! It even made me question my own sanity as I secretly cheered Juliette along in her mission.  

Summary:

If you are looking for an unusual psychological thriller with a somewhat crazy but likeable heroine, then I urge you to give this one a go! The Perfect Girlfriend is Hamilton’s debut novel, and I really hope she will write more. I look forward to seeing what she will come up with next! 

Quotes:

"I developed a little theory recently, which I named my "Olive Stone Theory". Whenever I bite into an olive, I expect a stone. I am prepared. I am not like Nate - or pampered people like him, who expect to bite into their bloody olives, pitted, soft and perfect - I anticipate problems and mentally deal with them in advance."

"Trust is a luxury."

Thank you to Netgalley and Hachette Australia for the free electronic copy of this novel and for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.

Book Review: IF I DIE BEFORE I WAKE by Emily Koch

Title: If I Die Before I Wake

Author: Emily Koch
Publisher: Random House UK, Vintage Publishing
Read: September 2017

Expected publication: 11 January 2018

My Rating: 🌟🌟🌟

Book Description (Goodreads):

Everyone believes Alex is in a coma, unlikely to ever wake up. As his family debate withdrawing life support, and his friends talk about how his girlfriend Bea needs to move on, he can only listen.

But Alex soon begins to suspect that the accident that put him here wasn’t really an accident. Even worse, the perpetrator is still out there and Alex is not the only one in danger.

As he goes over a series of clues from his past, Alex must use his remaining senses to solve the mystery of who tried to kill him, and try to protect those he loves, before they decide to let him go.

My musings:

I know that this book is not going to be published until January. Plus, I have plenty of books on my reading list that I should be reading first. But I felt like I just needed something a bit different, something that stood out from the fray– what would fit the bill better than a mystery told from the POV of a character in a permanent vegetative state, his active mind trapped in a lifeless body and unable to communicate? I just couldn’t resist!

Alex is in a coma, unable to move his body, eat, speak, or even move his eyes.  Two years after a terrible climbing accident, the doctors have long given up on him ever regaining any function and have been unable to prove that Alex is even aware of his surroundings. Pneumonia has almost claimed his life several times, but still Alex clings on to the small hope that one day he can return to his old life, his girlfriend, his family. Lying helpless in bed, totally at the mercy of others, he overhears his visitors talking about the incident that has cost him his life as he knew it, but as hard as he tries to think back, he cannot remember anything. Hearing that the police are investigating his accident as a possible attempted murder, Alex is determined to find out what happened – if it’s the last thing he will ever do.

I really loved the premise of If I Die Before I Wake, which was both original and captivating. Imagining what it must feel like for our main character, Alex, trapped in his own body unable to communicate even his most basic needs or pain, created an almost unbearable tension. His frustration over his helplessness was highlighted by the many scenes in which he had to endure pain or suffering, simply because of being locked into his lifeless body. It was horrible to imagine what this must be like! The mystery element is well thought out and kept my attention, and it was interesting how slowly but surely all the pieces of the puzzle came together in Alex’s mind. The interpersonal relationships were sensitively drawn – the nurses, the doctors, Alex’s girlfriend and family – and made for some touching and some infuriating moments.

The main issue I had with the book was the pacing. Whilst Alex’s predicament made for an original plotline, it also slowed down the story quite significantly in places, whilst the reader follows his long internal dialogue and his daily frustrations. It reminded me a bit of Tom Hanks’ epic movie Castaway, where a marooned Chuck Noland only has his volleyball to talk to – which, to be fair, is very original, but wore a bit thin after a while. Parts of the story dragged a bit for me, and I would have liked to have a different element introduced, a different POV perhaps, just to move the story along and shed light on some other aspects of the investigation Alex was not privy to. Some threads didn’t seem to go anywhere, like the scene where Alex’s catheter “fell out”, which made me wonder if I had missed something? Because of this, I struggled at times to fully connect to Alex, hoping for things to move along a bit faster than they did. 

Summary:

All in all, If I Die Before I Wake was a very original mystery written from the POV from the most unlikely character – a man trapped inside his lifeless body, surely one of the most terrible situations a person could find themselves in. Koch explores this topic with sensitivity and insight, realistically portraying the frustrations of her helpless character as he strives to find out the truth. Whilst the pacing was a bit slow for me at times, the story certainly made up for it in originality. One of the most unusual mysteries I have read this year.

Thank you to Netgalley and Random House UK for the free electronic copy of this novel and for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.

Book Review: THE WISH CHILD by Catherine Chidgey

Title: The Wish Child

Author: Catherine Chidgey
Publisher: Random House UK
Read: August 2017

My Rating:🌟🌟🌟🌟

I am the wish child, the future cast in water. I am the thrown coin, the blown candle; I am the fallen star.

Book Description (Goodreads):

Germany, 1939. Two children watch as their parents become immersed in the puzzling mechanisms of power. Siggi lives in the affluent ignorance of middle-class Berlin, her father a censor who excises prohibited words (‘promise’, ‘love’, ‘mercy’). Erich is an only child living a lush rural life, aware that he is shadowed by strange, unanswered questions.

Drawn together as Germany’s hope for a glorious future begins to collapse, the children find temporary refuge in an abandoned theatre amidst the rubble of Berlin. Outside, white bedsheets hang from windows; all over the city people are talking of surrender. The days Siggi and Erich spend together will shape the rest of their lives.

My musings:

Everyone who knows me knows that I am a sucker for WWII books, so when I saw The Wish Child on Netgalley I couldn’t resist! After closing the last page, I am not quite sure where to begin, because The Wish Child must be one of the strangest – or should I say most unusual – and haunting WWII books I have ever read! The entire book is being told in the surreal voice of a ghostly omniscient being which seems to follow the two main protagonists Erich and Siggi wherever they go, infiltrates their lives and commentates on the environment of the times. I spent the first half of the book wondering who this narrator could be, and how it is connected to the story. There are a few hints throughout the book, but its true identity is not revealed until the end, when it all falls into place perfectly. As in The Book Thief, where Death narrates the entire novel, this mysterious voice added an air of mystery to the story that made the book stand out for me.

Erich and Siggi are two innocent children caught up in the events of WWII, one growing up as the daughter of a censor in Berlin, the other on a rural property near Leipzig. Bit by bit, their innocence is shattered by the horrors of war, their lives connecting due to unexpected circumstances. By offering a child’s perspective of the propaganda and the general hype surrounding Hitler, the author catches a unique snapshot of this time in history not usually found in other novels of the genre.

“On these nights, when the planes were almost too remote to hear, Sieglinde wished she could climb into her parents’ bed. But this was not a gypsy camp; this was not a den of dogs.”

But Chidgey doesn’t stop there – she also includes small chapters of two ordinary German women’s conversations in the story, as well as the internal dialogue of a teacher taking a class of children on school excursions to Berlin’s factories, where items necessary to the war effort are being produced (and other things too – some very chilling moments here!). The constant danger of living under a dictatorship is beautifully demonstrated in the conversations between Frau Miller and Frau Müller, two factory workers, discussing daily life under Hitler as the war progresses. This may sound unusual, and it certainly was! I loved the way the author manages to capture the essence of the times in those snippets of conversation and musings in often hidden phrases and seemingly innocent words – it was so very cleverly done!

Due to our ghostly narrator, there is an era of mystique but also malice underlying the entire story, which often gave me goosebumps. There are many elements of a kind of magic realism, or symbolism, hidden amongst the pages that convey the full horror of the war, reflected in somewhat puzzling scenes in the book (like the shifting walls of Siggi’s apartment or the snippets of words she keeps hidden in her tin of treasures that take on a life of their own). Whilst most of the actions pertain to the two children’s lives and fates during those horrible war years, the author also catches a perfect snapshot of the general atmosphere and attitudes of many German people during that time, even those small doubts and acts of passive resistance that were often the only thing people felt safe to offer.

Frau Müller: There’s no need. I meant nothing. It means nothing.
Frau Miller: Everything means something.
Frau Müller: The lies that fall from the sky – they are not suitable reading. You should not be reading them. They should be burned.
Frau Miller: Quite right. Quite right. And I do. But sometimes one notices a sentence here and there as one is gathering them to burn.
Frau Müller: One should stop noticing.

This is a very difficult book to review, as it relies so much on its “unusual” elements! I really enjoyed it, although it was (expectedly) very disturbing at times, and had me asking many questions along the way, many of which still haunt me. The Wish Child would undoubtedly make a fantastic book club book, as everyone will have a different take on some of these elements, and I personally would love to be able to discuss them a bit more deeply. 

Summary:

The Wish Child is a clever, multi-layered novel offering a very unique perspective of the events of WWII. Told by a ghostly omniscient narrator and including unusual elements not often found in other novels of the genre, the story takes on a haunting and thought-provoking air that stayed with me long after reading it and made it memorable for me. I thoroughly enjoyed The Wish Child and can fully recommend it to all lovers of historical fiction. 

Thank you to Netgalley and Random House UK - Vintage Publishing for the free electronic copy of this novel and for giving me the opportunity to provide an honest review.